Short Films in Focus: Bob’s Funeral

I should have written about “Bob’s Funeral” last month for Father’s Day, since it is about fatherhood and how some get it right and some get it wrong. It’s a documentary told from a son’s point of view, someone trying to get answers about his family’s past and why his grandfather’s funeral was so somber while his dad’s was more celebratory. It is also about how one side of a family is estranged from the other, and the drama that still unfolds whenever they are in the same room. 

The “Bob” in the title refers to filmmaker Jack Dunphy’s grandfather, who died in 2019. The film opens on the morning of Bob’s funeral. Dunphy cannot help but bring his video camera everywhere he goes. He takes all the blame when the family runs late for the funeral, a church service where everyone struggles to deliver a heartfelt eulogy for the deceased. What does this say about Bob, his family, and how he raised his kids?

Dunphy’s own father, Mark (son of Bob), seemed to be a much more gracious and well-liked person. He died of stomach cancer just a few months after Bob passed away. Through some crude but charming cut-out animation, Dunphy talks about some of the more embarrassing memories he associates with his father, including an incident involving magnum-sized condoms. He also delves into some of the more hurtful aspects of his relationship with his father. At the same time, he reiterates the important role humor plays in his family, which seems to be the opposite of how Mark was raised by Bob, his father, who ran a pretty strict household. 

Dunphy’s film is heartfelt and revealing, even though he is told on many occasions by his family members to put the camera down or “get that camera away from me.” He has that documentary filmmaker’s instinct to dig deeper into the family dynamic and ask all the uncomfortable questions people would think twice before answering. As a result, he sometimes gets non-answers from his family that say just enough for us to interpret something substantial. 

In the end, the film is about how we’re remembered and how that memory determines the tone of your funeral. Bob’s funeral was difficult, and for good reason. Mark’s memorial service, which took place in a flower shop. Reminded me of my dad’s Celebration of Life a few years ago. Everyone worked hard on their eulogies. Everyone had a funny memory. Tons of people turned out for it, way more than we expected. Dunphy’s film is a funny and sincere tribute to a life well-lived, flaws and all.

from Roger Ebert https://ift.tt/Gbm9xqW